BHAKTI SAD ACARA – INFECTIOUS COMPASSION

His Holiness Bhakti Brhat Bhagavata Swami offered a course on vaisnava etiquette. Although it is nice to be familiar with vaisnava etiquette I did not have spontaneous eagerness for the topic. I wanted to attend the course for the purpose of association and growth. So I went.

"This will be easy, I can relax and enjoy hearing Maharaj speak on Bhakti Sadacara or may be he will go off topic, I love hearing him speak in Bhagavatam class." These thoughts are going through my mind in an evil attempt at controlling how I will enjoy this class. No submissive attitude in sight, just an enjoyer mentality. I am constantly reminded of why I am in this material world instead of with Krishna, I have a desire to enjoy separately from Him. I was in for a surprise.

First day, before we even start... SURRENDER!!!

I want to sit quietly and listen. Maharaj approaches me to lead a group. “Maharaj”, I said, “I really prefer not to lead” “It will be easy, all you have to do is facilitate. Thank you. You will lead a group.” My mind is repeating his words and alternating them with my own,

“SURRENDER, you don’t need to be in control of the situation.
TRUST in Krishna.
What is coming your way is meant for you... for your purification.
You have no idea what you need.
Trust in Krishna, surrender.”

"All leaders please come to the front." says Maharaj. A good friend had also been selected as leader but she refused, she couldn’t do it. This is the moment when she backed out. So now I have my team, a group of women I mostly don’t know. My friend is not with me. That is OK, everything is according to Krishna's plan. I am choosing to accept what is coming my way. We were asked to prepare 2-4 plays enacting different situations wherein vaisnava behaviors were manifested. I have a new mantra resounding in my head:

“Surrender, surrender, surrender,
don’t wear masks, you are who you are,
nothing more, nothing less,
just do your best, it is good enough.”

Especially when I am in what I choose to see as stressful situations I have had the tendency to escape in borrowed identities but not this time. It is all due to pride, and thinking I can pretend to be better than I am. Today I will be who I am and serve the devotees by facilitating their group work, best I can, it is good enough.

“Surrender, surrender, surrender, don’t wear masks,
you are who you are, nothing more, nothing less...”

That had been my conclusion after Mahatma prabhu's forgiveness seminar. I would hang on to this new belief.

I knew I had to take this Bhakti Sadacara seminar. I didn’t quite know what to expect, what was in it for me? I would find out day by day.

The first evening as I walked around the Mayapur complex, I met another leader from the class.

“How are you doing with your team? Will you be done in time? Are you worried?”

I was worried, not legitimate worries just worried about looking good. What is the use of such a worry cluttering my mind. Then he said the magic words that set me free from the false identification my sick false ego was coaching me to assume:

“Just have fun with it, don’t worry”

Something about these familiar words just set me straight. I was for the time being, free from the grasp of pride and control. I knew it. I knew I had to relax and give up any idea of control, but I needed to hear it, Krishna takes good care of me, he sent me the right person strolling around the compound. Thank you, Krishna.

Over the 5 days, we discussed all the different aspects of Bhakti Sadacara, with a special focus on offending devotees and how to obtain forgiveness. Sometimes it was difficult to hear. There is no hope for one who has offended a devotee and is not forgiven. Somehow one must be forgiven in other to progress. Somehow find a way to be forgiven. I was remembering the story of Durvasa Muni and Ambarisa Maharaj. Only the forgiveness of Ambarisa could free Durvasa Muni. How great was Ambarisa Maharaj who saw himself as the offender, such a lesson to be learned in this story.

“if you are unable to concentrate on your japa, if you do not see Krishna
when you are chanting, there has to be an offense you are committing."

Is a vaisnava aparadha keeping me away from Krishna? an offense to a devotee? Although unworthy of forgiveness, I beg forgiveness to all those I have offended knowingly or unknowingly throughout my many lives.

I sometimes answered questions or asked questions, it felt good to not be right, to not know everything, it felt good... and especially it felt real. Maharaj is strict, with compassion.

As I went home every night I felt uplifted and would look at my day. What was said? What was done that caused this in me? It was hard to pin point. I was learning surrender and humility while Maharaj was teaching respectful vaisnava behaviors. Is it a coincidence? I receive knowledge on Bhakti Sadacara but also what I needed most, so did everyone else.

Maharaj did talk about humility on one of the days however, it was mostly through example that I was learning. First you have to be honest, no pretending (no masks), then as you learn to tolerate up to 100% you will reach humility.

trinad api sunichena

taror api sahishnuna

amanina manadena

kirtaniyah sada harih

"One should chant the holy name of the Lord in a humble state of mind, thinking oneself lower than the straw in the street; one should be more tolerant than a tree, devoid of all sense of false prestige, and should be ready to offer all respect to others. In such a state of mind one can chant the holy name of the Lord constantly." - Caitanya Mahaprabhu's Siksastakam #3

On the 4th day there was an amazing performance facilitated by the leader I had met on the first night, the "Just have fun with it" leader. The group's performance touched everyone in the room. They managed to instill strong feelings of stress, anxiety, even hatred to the audience. They had been assigned to display what a vaisnava aparadha is and were very creative, powerful. It was all pervading, the emotions temporarily covered our communal consciousness just like a thick, dark cloud. This is when I started to understand what had been happening to me, how this seminar was impacting me.

It was the getting together of more than 60 sincere devotees focused on spiritual growth that had been so uplifting. More than 60 remarkable devotees, plus one amazing leader who knew how to tame my pride, created this spiritual atmosphere that we were all able to take home with us. It was our collective energy that was so powerful, the potency of vaisnava association. An infectious compassion was entering my stone like heart.

Vanca kalpa tarubhyas ca
krpa sindhubhya eva ca
patitanam pavanebhyo
Vaisnavebhyo namo namah

I offer my respectful obeisances unto all the Vaisnava devotees of the Lord.
They are just like desire trees who can fulfill the desires of everyone,
and they are full of compassion for the fallen conditioned souls

Friendships were created, growth stimulated, offenses forgiven. Maharaj could finally relax after 5 days of being strong and stern in compassionately working with us, teaching us. We all rested as we were exhausted from the growth we just experienced and Maharaj left for Delhi en route to Africa for more teaching, more seminars.

Let this verse from Vaisnava Das, a vaisnava poet that Srila Gour Govinda Maharaja would often quote, be my inspiration:

vaisnavera guna gana,
korile jivera trana

suniache sadhu-guru mukhe

"I have heard from the lips of sadhu-guru,
if you glorify a devotee, you will be delivered very easily.
Krishna will be very pleased and you will get his mercy very easily."

Only in Mayapur do we get so many variegated opportunities for transcendental growth and training. Mayapur, a community of devotees wanting to advance in their spirituality, getting closer to Radha Madhava's pure devotional service and love.

More next time, as I slowly and happily take one step at a time towards Radha and Krishna's Love and pray for the mercy of the vaisnavas without whose mercy I am lost.

Begging to remain the servant of your servants.

Living in Mayapur, what a gift!

Cleanse your heart – Part 2

Regularly senior devotees visit Mayapur and are eager to share their knowledge and experiences. It is becoming the hub for seminars focused on spiritual growth. In Caitanya Mahaprabhu's time Navadwip was know as a center for learning and once again with the devotees' desire, this status may be revived.

We were lucky to have H.G. Mahatma prabhu with us for a short while He is an experienced preacher and senior disciple of Srila Prabhupada who is extending his compassion the residents of Mayapur by presenting these seminars.

In sharing a few statements from my notes on these seminar topics I hope that some of you will feel inspired to invite H.G. Mahatma prabhu to your area to facilitate these or other seminars for the benefit of those who surround you. He can be reached via his website, Mahatmadas.com

Fault-finding and Failures

“If you chant my name while disregarding other devotees, it is like burning
cinders being thrown at my chest” – Caitanya Mahaprabhu in Caitanya Bhagavata

We examined our heart to see what is the Cause, Pay off, and Cost, in engaging is something as hurtful to Caitanya Mahaprabhu as finding faults with other devotees. In some cases it is related to self-glorification cause by pride and low self esteem but can also be caused by lack of forgiveness. It is cyclical. Low self-esteem and pride are two aspects of the same defect and they take turn in an evil repetitive dance while inflicting pain on others and oneself.

A vaisnava never wants to criticize because aparadha creates distance between the devotee and Radha, apa-Radha, without Radha. In meditating on others' faults they enter our own heart, it hurts us. Paradoxically, focusing on our own faults helps us. Someone may wonder about the use of a personal inventory of our own defects, is it only a modern concept? According to vedic psychology, as quoted by Mahatma prabhu, defects should be presented to the buddhih, the intelligence, in this way they gradually become burnt. There is ta major difference between examining ourselves or others for flaws of character.

One may ask, what is the solution? Here are some suggestions from the course.

• Work on developing qualities such as forgiveness while the process (Bhakti yoga) is working on us
• Learn to glorify others
• Pray for our pride to be replaced with humility

In looking at how to deal with failures, we realized that we don’t need to wait for others' encouragement to go on with our progress. It can be helpful to remind ourselves of a time when we were happily engaged in service, a time when we exhibited sincerity. It is within us to be again like that.

We were given time to create a prayer to Krishna, one that is specifically addressing our own failure(s). I would have liked to present everyone’s prayer to Nrisingha deva, on a silver platter decorated with flowers. I hope they reached Him. I hope mine reached Him.

We were encouraged to move out of our comfort zone as what we want, our aspirations are beyond it.

“The greatest danger is not that we aim too high and fail to achieve but that we aim too low and achieve it” – Michael Angelo

It is not failing that makes one a failure but giving up! There are different ways to look at failure, the option is always there to see whatever we do as either a success or a learning experience. We should set our spiritual advancement thermostat higher and higher so that it doesn’t act as a boundary to our progress.

“You are your biggest obstacle to your spiritual advancement.” - H.D.G. A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupada

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a feeling situated between humility and compassion it is an integral part of Bhakti. Where there is no forgiveness there can be no Bhakti. This understanding is from Jaiva Dharma by Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur.

“Only when I can properly honor all living entities will I be able to
chant properly and all my offenses will cease.” – Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur

Forgiveness can be seen as giving up any hope of a different past.

By holding on to resentment one can re-experience the hurtful feelings repeatedly. The one who initially caused the pain is free from these feelings; we alone are experiencing the pain again and again. We are self inflicting this pain.

During this seminar some of us realized that it was ourselves we could not forgive due to a belief we alone created. Others had to face their resentment towards others. As the two full days on forgiveness went on, gradually, we could see faces become brighter, free from resentment. Eventually, most of us left without the baggage we came with, or at least lighter.


Forgiveness is a choice. Forgiveness is my choice.

More next time, as I slowly and happily take one step at a time towards Radha and Krishna's Love.


your servant of the servants

Living in Mayapur, What a gift! - Cleanse your heart Part 1

Living in Mayapur, what a gift! 

Cleanse your heart – Part 1

In previous posts I showed how fortunate it is to be here because of the places you can visit, because of the dham basis, because of the spiritual atmosphere that is ready to ornate every activities one performs. Now let me tell you about other opportunities for growth.

At the end of December, H.G. Mahatma prabhu was visiting Mayapur. He joined Iskcon in 1969 and has served as temple president, book distributor, sankirtana leader, college preacher, membership director, and VIHE teacher and co-director. He is well known in Iskcon for his recorded music and his seminars.

He is the founder of Touchstone Training, a company that teaches the practices of devotional service through interactive seminars and worships. He is also a facilitator in Bhagavat Life, producers of live and online workshops and japa retreats. Although he currently lives in Alachua with his wife Jahnava and daughter Brajasundari, we are hoping they will move to Mayapur by the fall. He can be reached via his website, www.mahatmadas.com

Mahatma prabhu was meeting up with a group of pilgrims from UK. As part of their pilgrimage package over the Christmas holiday they were to spend time on 3 mini seminars with him:

1. Japa

2. Fault finding and failures

3. Forgiveness.

JAPA

It was the residents’ good fortune that the seminars were opened to them although scheduled primarily for the UK pilgrims. Two afternoons is not a lot to discuss the importance and glories of the holy names but it is a start.

“When you chant…. chant.”

That was the opening statement. We went on to discuss the importance of attention while chanting and also how prayer need not be overlooked. Krishna and His holy names are present before us. While one should not see the Lord as a merchant, “I will chant 16 rounds and you give me…..” It is proper to ask for 2 things: “How can I serve You?”, “How can I love You?”. In the course of wanting to serve Krishna we may need to get rid of pride, attachment etc, we will need to trust and surrender.  Krishna may at His will bless us with strength to overcome our anarthas or help us achieve humility, trust, surrender...

We created an image to help us understand how to chant. What does belong in our heart at that time and what doesn’t.

 

Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur says in Harinam Cintamani that it is not possible for one to control the mind. However if a sincere devotee asks Krishna for His help, Krishna Himself will step in and help.

In conclusion, Mahatma quoted H.H. Sacidananda swami is saying that chanting is more than a process, chanting is relationship, Krishna is there, and we are there, two means relationship. We should chant as though we are knocking at the door of an estranged beloved wanting to start our relationship again.

There is much more I could share about this seminar but will stop here suggesting that if you ever get the opportunity to attend a japa seminar, it might change your life. You may learn how to invite Krishna to join you in your japa, a time spent together.

The alternative is to stay with your mind and let Krishna stay far away, which one do you choose?

More next time, as I slowly and happily take one step at a time towards Radha and Krishna's Love.

your servant of the servants